How to spot a fake dating profile

Fake profiles are among the most frustrating sides of looking for a partner online. They cost you time, play with your feelings, and in the worst case they're after your money. The good news is that a fake profile almost always leaves traces, if you know what to look for. On this page we set out the concrete signals, in the photos, in the behaviour, and in the conversations, so you can judge for yourself whether someone is real. And we explain what to do when you're in doubt.

Signals in the photos

The photo is often the first place a fake profile gives itself away.

Watch for photos that look too perfect, as if they come from an advert or a model. Scammers often use stolen images. You can check this yourself with a reverse image search through Google Lens or TinEye: upload the photo and see whether it turns up elsewhere on the internet, for example under a different name. If the same photo appears in dozens of places, something is off.

Be alert too to profiles with just one photo, or with photos where the face is never quite clearly visible. And with the rise of AI, a new category has been added: images that look real at first glance, but on closer inspection have strange details, such as odd hands, ears, or a background that doesn't add up.

Signals in the behaviour

Even without looking at the photo, behaviour often reveals a lot.

A well-known pattern is love bombing: someone showers you with compliments, big feelings, and future plans after just a few messages, while you barely know each other. It feels flattering, but it's a technique to force a bond quickly. Watch too for someone who wants to leave the dating site right away and move the conversation to WhatsApp or another channel. On the platform itself there's oversight and a report button; outside it there isn't, and scammers know that.

Other signals: someone who never wants to video call or always cancels a meeting at the last moment with an excuse, someone who tries to isolate you from friends and family, and someone whose stories are vague or keep changing. Anyone who's honest has no trouble with a video call or a meeting in public.

The clearest alarm signal: money

If there's one signal where you should stop immediately, it's this: someone asking for money. In whatever form, and with whatever story. A medical emergency, a trip gone wrong, a great investment, a temporary problem with the bank. The stories are endless, but the request is always the same.

This isn't rare. The Dutch Fraud Helpdesk registered hundreds of victims over part of 2024 with millions of euros in combined losses, and the real numbers are probably higher because many people are ashamed to report it. Never transfer money to someone you only know online, and never give out copies of your passport, driving licence, or bank details.

What to do when you're in doubt

If you're in doubt about a profile, you don't have to bail out straight away, but be careful.

Keep communicating through the platform itself, so you can report behaviour and your personal details stay shielded. Ask pointed questions and notice whether the answers are consistent. If you like, look the person up with a reverse image search or check whether a real, active profile exists elsewhere. And perhaps most important: discuss it with someone you trust. A scammer tries precisely to isolate you, so a fresh outside view is exactly what helps.

If you don't feel safe or you suspect fraud, break off contact and report the profile to the site. In the Netherlands you can also report dating fraud to the Fraud Helpdesk and file a report with the police.

Why the platform's setup is half the work

How many of these signals you run into depends heavily on where you search. On large, anonymous apps where anyone can create a profile without checks, fake profiles are simply more numerous. That's one of the biggest complaints about those kinds of apps, something we also discuss in why people look for an alternative to Muzz.

On a platform where real people check the registrations and where profiles are verified, the barrier for scammers is much higher. That's exactly why Vesile works with manual verification. It doesn't remove all risk, but it makes an enormous difference. How to go about things safely otherwise, you can read in getting to know someone safely as a Muslim woman.

Frequently asked questions

What's the clearest sign of a fake profile?

A request for money, in any form. Anyone you only know online who asks for money should never be trusted. Stolen photos and refusing to video call are strong signals too.

How do I check whether a photo is stolen?

Use a reverse image search through Google Lens or TinEye. Upload the photo and see whether it appears elsewhere on the internet, possibly under a different name. That points to a stolen image.

What do I do if I think I'm dealing with a fake profile?

Keep communicating through the platform, don't share money or personal details, discuss it with someone you trust, and report the profile. If you suspect fraud, in the Netherlands you can report it to the Fraud Helpdesk and file a police report.

Are there fake profiles on verified platforms too?

No platform is completely free of risk, but manual verification and human checks make it much harder for scammers. That's why Vesile deliberately works with verification.

Looking for a place where profiles are checked by people rather than anyone simply walking in? At Vesile we work with manual verification, so you can focus your attention on real, serious introductions.